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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Maximus Spittimus ~ Talkie Tuesday

This week we have a different kind of Talkie Tuesday.  Maximus Spittimus has deemed to tell us his story.

I, The Emporer of The Universe and all things and whatsits and bits that are mine as all bits are, was born and hissed and spat at life, the universe and everything.

One day a Two Legs came and took me from my brother and sister. My mum hissed and spittedimuss and bit him on the leg. I hissed and spittedmuss and bit him on the hand. My brother and sister ran away - but then again...they weren't meimuss.

I was put in a cage in the Two Legs houseimuss and hissed and spat - and ate food and slept but only when The Two Legs wasn't lookingimuss.

The Two Legs said I was 'Feral'. I has no idea what that means so it must mean I am specialimuss.

When I was still little - but bigger than the little I was - the Two Legs lets me out of cage and I hissed and spits at other cats so they would knowimuss I was THE CAT.

The other cats accepted me as their leader - except when they hit me on the headimuss and batted me around the floorimuss and had the audacity to suggest I was little and should know my placeimuss!!!

I knows my placeimuss!!!!

I is Maximus Spittimus!!!! The Emporer Maximus Spittimus!!!! The reason for the universe and ALL things existing!!!

My DJ advised me and guided me and then he diedimuss....I was shocked!!! My advisor left me...but not in my headimuss!!!

DJ was oldimuss...he was 21 years oldimuss!!! That is not old that is ancients!!!

DJ told me I was destined to rule the universe...I had no idea what the universe was but I is quite hppy to rule it!!!

So I does.

I rules the universe. The Maximus Spittimus Universe. The only universe. It is THE ONE UNIVERSE as I is THE ONE AND ONLY MAXIMUS SPITTIMUS.

When DJ went to GREAT CAT, Scampi - who is 21 years old too....21????? That is not old...that is waaaaaay beyond old - said "MAXIMUS! You is great cat and you will rule all the universe!" - well Scampi maybe old and senile and daft as a brush but he knows things!!!! He knows I is in chargeimuss!!!

I as Centurions watching over me.


SCAMPI THE WISE.....

BUMBLE THE TEACHER....

STEALTH BOMBER THE HUNTER....

...and now I as Centurions around the world watching over me.

I is here immortal!!! I is here foreverimuss!!!!

I rules foreverimuss!!!...and I will be kind to ALL.....well...most all....

Two Legs who feed me are immortalimuss!!!.....Centurions who join me are immortalimuss!!!!.....even Wabbits and Dogs and Giraffes (what is Giraffe?) and Meerkats....they has Kat in their name so...er....Kat...Cat....oh I doesn't know....my Centurions protectimuss ME!!!!!

I is ONE. I is only ONE year old and I is THE ONLY ONE.

The only and immortal ruler of the universe
MAXIMUS SPITTIMUS.


 ...and I has spokens.

You is the honourimuss of my speakings

Four Dinners
Aide de Camp
Maximus Spittimus

Thank you to Four Dinners & Maximus Spittimus for doing this Talkie Tuesday!

11 comments:

Max the Quilt Cat said...

Nice Talkie Tuesday. I like the mop picture the best. HEE HEE... It makes me laugh.

Have a great day.

pawhugs, Max

Amy and The House of Cats said...

Oh yay! What a great post - we just adore Maximus! We are so excited that he was posting for Talking Tuesday!!

Katnip Lounge said...

We are Eternally Grateful for Maximus and his Universe!

sprinkles said...

I got your Christmas card today, Pam. Thank you! I haven't even started my cards yet, hoping to do that this weekend.

Four Dinners said...

Maximus Spittimus has asked me to advise you that you are honoured to have HIS presence on your blog.

Four Dinners
Aide de Camp
Maximus Spittimus

ps...nice one. Ta very much x

Mr. Pip said...

OMD!!! I think I have to go meet Maximus at once!

Your pal, Pip

THE OLD GEEZER said...

I added myself to follow your blog. You are more than welcome to visit mine and become a follower if you want to.

God Bless You :-)

~Ron

meowmeowmans said...

Great Talkie Tuesday, Maximus! You did a PAWsome job!

bichonpawz said...

Great Job! Love all the pictures!! Makes me miss my kitties!!

Alvin said...

Grateful for nice sharing! You have captured each and every loved instant. She is looking like a doll in her picture with wool hairs.
pet supplies online australia

Four Dinners said...

She?????...oh well...he is Australian...;-)

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